Intimacy
by Joelcoxriley
Summary: Cole thought he was ready. He wasn't. Solona was right; Intimacy is scary. *One of two sexually mature scenes; Cole's POV.*


**Hello. This is part one of two. While technically not a sex scene, I put it in here anyway. The part where it come in Stories in the Ink isn't up yet, and this takes place sometime after the final battle. I just wrote this out so I wouldn't forget how I wanted the levels to build. I had the idea right after Nana's death in the main series of one shots, but was too busy to write it out and forgot what was going to take place. So I do not think this chapter is as good as what I had originally planned. These also aren't supposed to be "sexy", but instead focus on emotion. Or at least I try to focus them on emotion. Cole's thought process helps.** **Either way, I hope you enjoy.**

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Tongues tied tenderly, hot breath caught between wanting lips, hands search and grasp hungerly, tugging at the cloth of clothes, running through seas of night and sun and caressing, tender yet testing, pushing, breaking passed restraints.

Our lips danced, hers soft against mine, tongue gliding and exploring, feeling heated flesh and tasting her-sweet-like honey.

Our hands were busy, caressing gentle skin, leaving want and more, growing, consuming, burning. Pinpricks tickled where fingers spun their trails, longing and wanting yet never sating.

One by one the layers fell, want growing, hurting and burning, blocking out the fear, the fear of what would come next, the fear of intimacy, the fear of being naked. Solona was right. Intimacy is scary. But it didn't matter.

I wanted her more, oh, so much more.

So much it _hurt_.

Flesh pressed against flesh in a dance that was hard to follow, and made the want hurt even more. Forehead to forehead, eyes to eyes, lips to parted lips, bodies breathing as one, hot breath upon fragile skin leaving a shutter of titillation and want.

And then I was on my back, and she above, hovering and toying, teasing in her dance.

She laughed whilst she teased and toiled, "Are you ready?"

Was I ready?

I tried to answer.

I couldn't.

I-

I couldn't-

I couldn't _breathe_.

Fear shaking, skulking at the edges, making them rough and ridged. Was I ready? I don't know, should I know? Yes? No? Yes, but no, no, but, yes...No, no, no, no, I can't, I can't relax, can't release. I wanted to hide-hide and go back to safety, comfort, a place where the edges weren't so rough and sharp, but soft and smooth. I wanted to run, run away and keep running. But how can I run if I can't _breathe_ , walls closing in, getting closer and closer, sheets strangling, room spinning. Loud, everything was so loud and I couldn't tell-tell if I was here, there, real, realer, not real, like a dream-

"Cole?"

She was looking at me, still looking, looking in lust-

"Cole, are you alright?"

No, judgement, judge and jury, looking in judgement, judging me-

"Just...just calm down, okay, Cole? N-Nothing has to happen."

No...concern. Worry. For me?

I looked upon her, breath ragged and ridged, my chest heaving with sweat. My heart was pounding so fast, I thought it would burst, fear gripping my chest, cold and heavy.

Her eyes were wide, curious yet fearful. Solona wasn't teasing anymore, nor dancing, nor on top. She was laying beside me now, worrying and fretting, gentle fingers touching my face. She was reassuring herself I was safe, in all her tender fury.

"Are you alright?" She asked. Her voice was soft and low, as if she didn't want to scare me further. But it wasn't her fault. I thought I was ready. I wasn't.

"Yes. No. I got scared. I'm sorry I ruined it."

"Don't be. It's my fault, I should have known better that to rush."

I became quiet, the want gone, no longer hurting, pushed down by fear, and then comfort. I hope her want wasn't as painful as mine. If it is, and she held back...then...

"I thought you would be angry at me. Does it hurt?" I asked. Solona looked at me, eyes like a quivering wave in the moon's light. She always said my eyes were beautiful. I don't know if that's true. It's hard to look at your own eyes without taking them out.

Her brow wrinkled, a look of confusion, "Does what hurt?"

"The want?"

"The want?...Oh. I see." Solona shrugged, "I wouldn't call it painful. But it is present. It will fade in time."

I paused, unsure what to say, tongue forgetting, "...Thank you."

She smiled, small yet sincere, "Awe, my sweet boy." Solona cooed, soft lips brushing against my cheek, "You're like me, but backwards."

"Intimacy is scary. I didn't think it would be." I spoke, Solona pressing against me, fingers in my hair, "When it's with someone you care about, it is."

She then yawned, back popping as she stretched, "But...I can wait. You waited for me."

I looked towards her, feeling her fingers in my hair, but their toying as slower, as if she were falling asleep. I wanted to say thank you, but saying something that simple didn't feel like it was enough.

"If it makes you feel better, I was nervous. Am nervous. But not scared. You aren't like the others. Not at all." She mumbled, and I felt proud.

I held her in my arms that night. I couldn't think of a way to express my thanks any other way. It was a small thing, a simple thing, but I wanted her to sleep in the arms of someone that would protect her and help her, not hurt and shame her.

Intimacy is scary, I know that know.

I thought I was ready, but I wasn't. Sometimes, I wonder what it would have been like if the want would have won, and not the fear, but it's okay.

For now, this is enough.

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 **Poor Cole. Either way, I'm not sure when the final scene will come out...nor the final battle in the main story, but I will work on them...slowly, but surely. So, one down and one to go. I think this one needs improvement, but if you have any comments or criticism let me know. Or if you want to say this crack pairing sucks and Cole would never partake in such activities and that Solona should jump off a cliff, by all means, feel free.**

 **Thank you all for supporting this terrible series and the crack pairing! Each and every one of you!**

 **Cheers!**


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